Editing: Adam, Cannongerbil, Xenthur
“My own home’s the best after all! I don’t want to go on any more trips for now! Something’s wrong if a hikikomori like me keeps traveling around!”
Once I returned to my home that I had been away from for so long, I felt at ease from the comfort of this place.
I had been running about recently, but it was strange for a hikikomori like me to be so earnest.
I’ll be getting a huge sum of money from the business deal with Vanir soon anyway.
I probably won’t need to travel any time soon.
No, I might as well stay inside the mansion all day for a while.
Luckily, the Crimson Demons were fine with us taking the entire bounty for defeating Sylvia.
And so, I suddenly got a large amount of cash.
I decided. I won’t find any more trouble.
Even if someone came crying to me, I’ll still chase them away.
“Really Kazuma, showing your bum nature immediately. But for some reason, seeing you like this makes me feel at ease. It’s like I don’t need to work hard anymore.”
“Aqua, you’re just relieved after seeing your own kind! Don’t be depraved and learn that guy, he’s a negative example!”
Darkness said something rude after listening to Aqua.
“Don’t say that. In the end, Kazuma performed quite admirably this time. He deciphered the ancient language and found out how to use the weapon. He even defeated Sylvia.”
Strangely enough, Megumin was speaking up for me.
“We only defeated Sylvia because of Megumin’s power. I merely directed it.”
“No, no, if not for the weapon that converts magic into pure destructive power, I wouldn’t be of much use. This is all thanks to Kazuma who brought the weapon there.”
Megumin and I pushed the credit to each other.
“… Hey Aqua, what’s with the two of them? I think something’s different about them after the trip… Co-could it be, when they were sleeping in the same bed, they…?”
“Hey, don’t talk nonsense, I didn’t do anything wrong! Hey Megumin, we didn’t… Hey, deny it properly! They’ll become suspicious!”
Even though Darkness gave us suspicious looks, Megumin still didn’t deny anything, and started walking toward Aqua.
Seemed like she was very concerned about the thing in Aqua’s hand.
By the way, Aqua would normally be the first to say something, so it was a rare sight for her to be quiet.
What had she been doing on the sofa…?
“When did you bring the game console back? Hey, let me play too, this item is most suited for a gamer like me!”
“If you want to borrow it, you need to pay the price! Specifically speaking, clean the bathroom for me tomorrow!”
As I was fighting for the Game Girl Aqua brought back.
There was a knock on the door, and the voice of a man came from behind it.
“Excuse me, is anybody there?”
Aqua and I looked at each other and nodded at the same time…
We snuck to the door.
“Is someone there… Oh, greetings sir. Are you the owner of this mansion…? What, what are you doing sir! Stop…!”
“I don’t know where you came from, but it’s probably some troublesome problems! Go back, you harbinger!”
“Kazuma, use Drain Touch! Suck his life force and knock him out! Then throw him outside and pretend he never came here!!”
“What are the both of you doing suddenly? Hey Kazuma! Stop it!”
“I can empathize with you on why you don’t want to get involved with any trouble, but you can’t assault someone you just met!”
Darkness and Megumin subdued me after I pounced on the guest, and my hands were bound.
The visitor was a man dressed like a butler, about fifty years of age.
He panted hard as he watched Aqua and me cautiously.
After Darkness got a good look of that butler-dressed man, she suddenly said loudly:
“What, aren’t you Hagen? Didn’t I tell you to not come to this mansion unless there’s an emergency? I’m not worried about you giving me trouble, rather, like just now– I was afraid that you’ll suffer inhumane treatment…”
Seemed like this butler was an employee of the Dustiness house.
And what do you mean ‘they would suffer inhumane treatment if they visit’?
… Although he did suffer inhumane treatment.
That butler coughed dryly and regained his composure.
“Young lady, naturally, I’m here for a matter of grave importance. Actually…”
Enough, I don’t want to be involved in more troubles!
I covered my ears to ignore the butler’s words, but Darkness grabbed my wrist and pulled them away from my ears, forcing me to listen together with her.
“No, don’t wanna! This has nothing to do with me, so don’t make me listen, don’t involve me! I don’t want to go anywhere or go near danger! I want to safely stay at home!”
“I’m concerned about the hygiene of the toilet after the trip, I’ll go clean it!”
Darkness grabbed me who was resisting intensely, captured Aqua who was attempting to slip away and asked the butler.
“What’s the matter? Did something happen at home?”
In response to Darkness’s question–
“It’s really terrible young lady! If this goes on, your only good point will disappear!”
The butler said something we couldn’t ignore.
“Hey, wait, what happened to Darkness’s only good point? Is it sagging? Is her slutty body going to sag? I’ve always found it strange, her body’s way too sexy! She must’ve used her money and authority to get magic items that make her boobs big!”
“What are you talking about? My strong point would be defense… That’s not it! Hagen, you’re too mean, I should have more strong points…! Say it Megumin, Aqua, I should have other strong points too, right?”
Darkness was on the verge of tears.
“Instead of that, does the breast enlargement magic item exist? If there is, please…”
“Kazuma and the old man are too mean! Our Darkness has many good points! She’s soft hearted and agrees to anything if you plead to her in tears. She believes everything that you teach her, so it doesn’t get boring-ow ow ow! Stop it Darkness, my head’s going to explode! I’m praising you, so what are you doing?”
Darkness grabbed the temples of Aqua, making her scream. The butler said:
“That’s wrong! If this goes on, the old master might be stripped of his nobility and the young lady will become a peasant! The unworldly young lady will only be able to make a living by selling her slutty body– Young lady! Please don’t do that to my old bones, I’ll die!”
While Darkness was strangling the butler in tears, a letter dropped to her feet.
“…? What’s this?”
“It’s a letter from the royal palace. Young lady, after you read it, you’ll understand the crisis impending on House Dustiness. And this is related to Satou-san over there…”
The butler glanced at me.
Stop, don’t drag me into this!
After opening the letter, Darkness’s face became more and more pale before finally kneeling onto the ground.
The content seemed serious.
“… What’s it about?”
I asked timidly and Darkness snapped back to her senses.
“No-no-nothing at all! This has nothing to do with Kazuma-sama! Please don’t mind it!”
Darkness suddenly used weird honorifics in her words, making me feel that something was off. And so, I reached my hand out.
“Show me the letter.”
“No, I refuse. No, I apologize for dragging you in every time. Hey, that’s what you said, right? You don’t want to be involved in troublesome matters anymore! And so, this matter–”
After I stole the letter, I read it quickly, with Aqua and Megumin peeking from behind. It read…
‘To the one who defeated many of the Demon King’s generals, a great adventurer who made exemplary contributions to the nation, Satou Kazuma-dono. I’ve heard about your marvelous accomplishments, and hope to meet with you face to face. May I enjoy a meal together with you?’
At the end of the letter was the emblem of the kingdom and the name of the author.
The name was Iris.
Even though I was unfamiliar with this world, I still knew that she was the first princess of this country.
A royal princess.
“Kazuma, let’s reject this invitation! If anything happens to first princess Iris, we’ll lose our heads! It’ll be a big problem if one of us did anything rude! You know nothing about ceremony and etiquette, right? You hate such restrictive events, right? Am I right? Let’s reject it! Yes, that’s right, the Dustiness house will book a good restaurant and we’ll only invite close friends to hold a party that commemorates your achievements! So…!”
I exchanged looks with Aqua and Megumin, and we all nodded our heads together.
“Our time has finally come!”
Darkness shook her head with tears in her eyes, grabbing onto my waist and refusing to let go.