Sending explosions to these damn ruins!
Editing: Adam, Boring Bone, Cannongerbil, Veritaum, Xenthur
“Hey, hey, wake up.”After my body was shaken violently, I woke with a start.It seemed that I had a nightmare; I dreamt that a transvestite was teasing me…
“… Waaahhhh! Stop it, Sylvia, don’t come near me! Or I’ll kill you!!”
“Hey, calm down. Don’t worry, I won’t do anything weird. The Crimson Demons have retreated, so I’ll let you go now. After all, you let me off once before.”
After hearing what she said, I was still a bit worried, but managed to keep my cool.
I realized now that there wasn’t anyone around me.
Looking around, I felt that I had been here before…
“This is the entrance to the underground warehouse of the Crimson Demon village, which is the place they sealed the ‘weapon that might destroy the world’.”
Sylvia said as she took out something like a magic item.
“… What is that?”
“You’re a smart man, you should be able to guess it, right? ‘Barrier Killer’– If I gave you this hint, you should be able to understand.”
“Your group kept trying to infiltrate this place to steal that weapon, right?”
“Correct. There’s a powerful magic item placed inside that warehouse. According to rumors, it’s a nemesis of the people in this village.”
Ju-just what was placed inside?
“However, I heard that the seal is unique and no one can open it. Also, no one can understand how to use that weapon.”
“Hmm? No problem, the magic item I have with me is an extremely powerful barrier killer in the demon world. It can even break the seals of the gods… Huh? T-This is odd…”
Sylvia squatted in front of the warehouse with her magic item in hand and said with a baffled voice.
“The magic item isn’t reacting at all! This seal isn’t magical in nature, just what…! What, what should I do…?”
Sylvia held her magic item in hand and was at a loss.
I looked at the seal from the side. On it was a touch screen keyboard complete with alphabet, numbers, and arrows.
I found something very familiar written on the touch screen.
“‘Konami code’…? What does it mean, it wants me to input the Konami code?”
“You, you can read the ancient language?”
Ancient language? I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Wasn’t that Japanese?
The Konami code was just the Konami code.
It was something from a famous game company–Konami.
“No, this is a language from my country. The Konami code is a cheat code everyone knows, and it’s asking me to enter the code here…”
I realized what I was saying and wanted to cover my mouth mid-way, but was caught by Sylvia’s hand.
“You’re really a man beyond my expectations; to think you can undo the seal neither I nor the Crimson Demons could break…”
“I-I’m also an adventurer, don’t think that I’ll submit to the Demon King’s army so easily. You saw that Archpriest earlier, she can use resurrection, so it’s useless to threaten to take my life…”
“Violence isn’t the only way to pry open the mouth of someone, all right? Hehe, my skills are on par with succubi; I wonder how long you can last in such ecstasy?”
Before Sylvia even finished, I keyed in the Konami code without hesitation.
With a mechanical clang–the heavy doors opened.
“… Really, can you even call yourself a man? Sigh, never mind, time’s short. It’s dark in there, I wonder what’s in front?”
Sylvia looked inside as she searched for something that could serve as a torchlight.
At this moment, her unguarded back was facing me.
… I might not have any weapons with me, but that’s still too careless.
Well, my only means of unarmed attack was Drain Touch anyway.
“Hmm? Did they turn off the lights when they were running away? No choice, although my night vision isn’t too good in total darkness…”
I suddenly realized that I didn’t need to fight in such a situation.
I sneaked to Sylvia’s back.
“Hey, do you have anything that can be used as a light source…?”
From the back–
– I pushed Sylvia into the dim underground warehouse.
“–? –! ––!!”
Sylvia was screaming something inside.
On the other side of the warehouse door, I could hear banging sounds.
“Kazuma! Are you all right? Where’s Sylvia?”
I turned back and saw Megumin rushing over in a hurry.
Yunyun and Bukkoroli were here too, Megumin probably dragged them along.
“You came too late, I locked Sylvia inside with an elegant counter attack. It seems that the door can’t be opened from the inside. Let’s leave her in there for a couple of weeks, that should tame her a little.”
Megumin was a bit fearful when she heard the soft curses coming from inside.
“You, you trapped her in there? Guess that’s fine, she probably can’t activate the weapon. No one knows how to, after all. Still, to think Sylvia could undo that seal…”
… I won’t mention the fact that the seal was undone by me.
“T-To lock a Demon King’s General inside… Such, such a cruel way of fighting…”
Darkness stared at the door that was being knocked continuously and said sympathetically.
“To capture Sylvia that escaped from our hands so many times, way to go outsider!”
“This gang of people have already taken down three generals of the Demon King’s army. Defeating Sylvia is nothing strange.”
The Crimson Demons congregating over showered me with praise.
“Hey Kazuma, isn’t that the place with the dangerous weapon? Is it really fine trapping that damn transvestite in there?”
The Crimson Demons answered when they heard what Aqua said:
“It’s fine, it’s fine, even we can’t comprehend how to use it; it’s impossible for Sylvia to understand.”
“Yeah, that’s right. If Sylvia can activate the weapon, I’ll walk one round around the village on my hands.”
“All right, let’s go have a drink.”
“… Hey, are they doing that on purpose? Are the Crimson Demons full of people who won’t feel happy unless they get into trouble? Will they feel uneasy if they don’t raise such flags?”
“Do-Don’t say that; I won’t deny that the Crimson Demons like to find trouble, but it’ll be fine this time. See, it’s getting quiet in there, maybe she suffocated?”
Listening carefully, I couldn’t hear the curses anymore.
I had an ominous feeling about this. Would it really be fine?
Even if they say that no one could activate the weapon inside…
“Hmm? … Hey Kazuma, can you feel the ground shaking?”
Darkness stamped her foot and asked.
“Hey, this is bad! I have a bad feeling about this! Let’s get out of here and…!”
“What are you scheming, Kazuma? We managed to take out the Demon King’s general, right? Hey, even though Kazuma did it alone, we’re a team, so we should split the bounty, right? Hehe, what should I buy with Sylvia’s bounty money?”
Seeing Aqua counting her eggs before they hatched, I realized immediately that things were going to be bad.
“You dumbass, why must you always raise a flag? Hey Megumin, Darkness! Let’s retreat! No, we should get the Crimson Demons to send us back to Axel…!”
Before I even finished, the ground suddenly rose and dust spread everywhere.
Under the glow of the moonlight, the one who appeared from the cloud of dust was…
“Ah, hahaha! You’ve got guts, boy! You think I came here just to steal the weapon? My name’s Sylvia! As you can see–”
With her body turned into that of a giant metallic snake…
“I’m a Demon King’s general that can combine with weapons and the like! Growth Chimera Sylvia!”
With a loud laugh, Sylvia flaunted her victory–
“It’s the ‘Mage Killer’! She absorbed the ‘Mage Killer’!”
The Crimson Demons cried out.
“Ahhh, oh no Kazuma! Things are a mess! Let’s run away, now, immediately, run!”
Megumin whose face had turned green pulled on my sleeve in a panic, totally different from just now.
However, I still had the Crimson Demon mob behind me.
I had an ace in the hole–
“Hey, that’s the Mage Killer!”
“Abandon the village! It’s hopeless!”
Or maybe not.
“Hey Megumin, explain it to me! What’s a Mage Killer? Is it really that scary? Is that the weapon that might destroy the world?”
I looked from the corner of my eyes at the Crimson Demons scattering away as I shook the shoulder of Megumin who wasn’t good at dealing with a crisis.
“The weapon that might destroy the world shouldn’t be like that…! However, the thing Sylvia combined with was equally dangerous, something called a ‘Mage Killer’…!”
Yunyun said with a green face.
“It’s something that’s completely immune to magic, the nemesis of the Crimson Demons. A weapon that specializes in killing mages!”
– This is the end.
To seek refuge, the Crimson Demons all went to the hill of the demon god, the popular spot for couples, and watched the Crimson Demon village ravaged by fire below.
“The village is burning…”
I heard a soft voice. Turning back, I found a girl who was wearing an eye-patch with the same design as Megumin, watching the burning village as she sadly spoke.
Sylvia, who had taken the form of a lamia, breathed out fire, flooding the Crimson Demon village in a sea of flame.
Most of the Crimson Demons could use teleport magic.
There were almost zero casualties, but their residences were up in flames.
My heart ached when I saw this scene.
Is- is this because I undid the seal?
No, I was forced by the circumstances.
Also, I only undid the seal because I heard that no one else knew how to activate it and use the weapon…
“By the way, how did Sylvia break that seal?”
When I heard this question, I shivered.
“Did she use a magic item to break the barrier? But no matter what kind of barrier destruction item it may be, it shouldn’t work on that seal…”
After hearing that, my heart pounded madly as I looked down at the village being razed…
“No matter what it is, we can only abandon this village. It’s frustrating to let the Demon King’s army get its way, but we can always make a comeback if we still have our lives.”
The village chief said in a serious tone.
… What should I do?
This atmosphere was too heavy.
Oh no, is this all because of me?
Because I went and undid that seal?
“Hey Megumin, is there really no way to fight that Mage Killer?”
I asked Megumin beside me bitterly.
“As explained earlier, as the name implies, Mage Killer’s a weapon specializing in exterminating mages. It’s immune to magic. I heard that when the Mage Killer went on a rampage long ago, our ancestors used another weapon that was sealed away to destroy it. After overcoming that crisis, they repaired the Mage Killer as a memento and sealed it again…”
“Why did they repair such a dangerous thing? …No, wait, you said that there’s a weapon that can fight the Mage Killer?”
When using poison, make sure to prepare the antidote.
To prevent a weapon from rampaging, there must be another weapon that can take it out kept near by–this was a common precaution. Thinking about it now, it made sense.
As a safeguard, the ancestors of the Crimson Demons must’ve kept the weapon that can defeat the Mage Killer should it rampage again.
In that case, with that thing–
She probably guessed what I was thinking.
“… Kazuma, unfortunately no one knows how to use the weapon that can fight the Mage Killer. The instruction manual’s left behind, but even the village chief can’t read it…”
Megumin said as she stared at the burning village.
The smart Crimson Demons must’ve already considered this method.
If magic was useless, it would be hopeless.
Compared to the gigantic snake, the original Sylvia seemed so small.
Except Darkness, anyone else would be turned into mush if they got hit.
… Was there no other way?
At this moment.
“Hmph… I’ll be the decoy and lure Sylvia away. With the support of all the Crimson Demons, I won’t die so easily.”
The one saying such foolish words was the muscle brained Crusader from my team.
“What are you saying? Don’t you know we’re totally helpless here? Are you stupid? Even a goblin knows better than to fight a futile battle. Are you dumber than a goblin?”
“You, you really–! We’ll settle this after we go back to Axel! I still remember those horrible words you said to me back then! Also, I’m not doing this without any plans!”
“While I’m aggravating Sylvia, you and Aqua, who have night vision, can use Lurk to sneak into that destroyed underground warehouse and retrieve that whatever weapon.”
“… But no one knows how to use the weapon in question! Weren’t you listening?”
I didn’t know what I should say to her. Darkness rebuked:
“Of course I heard. I understand that. But thinking about it the other way, won’t the problem be solved if we knew how to operate it? Acting would be better than standing idly around. Don’t worry, I don’t know what weapon that might be, but as a noble, I’m rather familiar with magic items. I even fixed my father’s magic camera by knocking it in the past.”
I felt dizzy after hearing the words of the aristocratic lady who was dumber than I imagined.
“… All right, let’s give it a shot.”
What surprised me was that Megumin, the one most likely to protest intensely, agreed.
“I don’t hate a situation where life and death depends on one single move!”
“In fact, I like it! You’re outsiders, but that’s pretty cool!”
Not just that, even the Crimson Demons were standing up.
Seemed that speech moved their hearts.
Normally, I would reject in participating in such a dangerous mission. But the scene of that lonely expression of that eyepatched girl was impressed deeply into my mind. I couldn’t just shake it away.
Damn it, it was just sneaking into the warehouse to retrieve a weapon. If I can redeem my sins by doing so…!
“Hey! The Demon King’s General is still rampaging in the village! Why are we doing something so dangerous like sneaking into the village? I don’t wanna! My specialty’s providing support to everyone from a safe spot!!”
“Stop messing around and come with me! I can’t sift through it all alone!”
I pulled the unwilling Aqua with me and headed toward the underground warehouse in the mysterious facility…!
To lure Sylvia away, the Crimson Demons unleashed all sorts of spells at it from a distance.
Whenever Sylvia came near, the Crimson Demons would pull away. A classic running battle.
However, the magic was ineffective and Sylvia wasn’t hurt at all.
“How long is this futile struggle going to last? I thought the Crimson Demons were smarter than this!”
Sylvia squirmed her glowing metallic body, mocking the Crimson Demons.
Switching from defense to offence, Sylvia looked determined to ravage the land to vent the frustration she had been accumulating all this while.
But the Crimson Demons kept their distance as they taunted Sylvia, so Sylvia couldn’t hurt them. She seemed to be really frustrated.
She probably hasn’t gotten used to her snake shaped body, her movement was sluggish.
The anxious Sylvia glared at a group of Crimson Demons with murderous intent.
She took a deep breath and spit blazing flames at them.
The group disappeared moments before they were engulfed by the fire.
Attackers formed teams with teleporters. After one of them finished chanting a teleportation spell, he would stand by at the side and use it during a pinch to save everyone.
The scene of Sylvia’s near miss attack kept on repeating, grinding away Sylvia’s patience. She then targeted one woman.
Even when the others attacked her with magic, Sylvia didn’t change her target, making a beeline for that woman.
Sylvia had changed her tactics to taking out one opponent at a time.
At this moment, a man watching this happening from afar screamed in despair.
He was the leader of the anti-Demon King’s army guerilla unit, Bukkoroli.
“Stop, stop Sylvia! Please! Don’t harm her!”
Sylvia was targeting a woman with a wooden sword. I remember her.
She used a powerful spell together with Bukkoroli to drive away the Demon King’s army that attacked the village…
Was she Bukkoroli’s lover?
Bukkoroli screamed at Sylvia, kneeling on the ground and crying for mercy as he watched Sylvia move closer to that woman.
Sylvia smiled happily when she heard Bukkoroli’s screams.
“You all killed my subordinates too, it’s payback time! Don’t worry, not just that woman, but also you, your family–everyone and this entire village will burn! … Prepare yourself!”
Sylvia, going insane from the torture of the Crimson Demons, was elated that she could finally have her revenge. She ignored Bukkoroli’s pleas and closed in on that woman.
The edge of the wooden sword-woman’s lips raised in a smile, and she shouted at Bukkoroli with an extremely sad expression:
“Run, even if it’s just you… I’ll give everything I have to fight Sylvia, so you must use this chance to run!”
Hey, don’t act like this!
Just how much tragedy would my action cause…?
That woman stared with determined eyes at the advancing Sylvia.
“Sylvia, this is my trump card! Watch carefully! And…”
The woman said as she glanced at Bukkoroli.
“Please, Bukkoroli… Forget about me, you must live a happy life…”
“Soketto! Please Sylvia, stop! Soketto, I’ll never forget you…!”
Hey stop! Damn it, no!!!
“You’re really resolute! Come, let me see your final trump card! No matter what spell it is, I’ll take–”
Before Sylvia finished–
Soketto had disappeared.
Bukkoroli, who was showing a pained expression one second ago, got up as if nothing happened, dusted his knees, and looked at Sylvia calmly.
At the climax of the drama, the target suddenly escaped.
Sylvia muttered in solitude.
“I, I absolutely hate the Crimson Demons.”
… I can empathize with you on this.
A Crimson Demon stood before Sylvia.
He had a sad expression…
“Sylvia, it’s so pitiful of you to end up like this… At least let me use my ultimate, ahhh! That burns! It’s rude to interrupt when delivering a cool line, Sylvia!”
He didn’t even finish before Sylvia spewed out fire. The man jumped away in a panic.
“I don’t want to drag this on anymore! If you don’t want to fight, then scram!”
After being repeatedly played by the Crimson Demons, Sylvia was losing her cool.
She was far away from the warehouse; this is a good chance.
I wanted to escape, but it couldn’t be helped as I was the one who caused this.
“All right, let’s go! Hey Darkness, if things look dangerous for the Crimson Demons, I’ll be counting on you! No matter how strong they are, they’re still mages; they can’t escape if they exhaust their mana.”
“I understand, leave it to me!”
Darkness nodded firmly. Beside her, Megumin–
“What, what should I do? I can’t use Teleport, so I can’t even stall for time…”
She said with an uneasy face.
“You’re the trump card during our critical moment. The Mage Killer only has high resistance to magic, right? Advance magic might be ineffective, but no one has tried fighting it with Explosion yet, right? Maybe Explosion will be able to deal some damage to it.”
I used this excuse and lied to Megumin.
To be honest, I didn’t plan on letting her use her spell.
I heard from Yunyun that things would be bad if the villagers knew that Megumin learned Explosion.
Right now, the Crimson Demons were engaging Sylvia…
“Ahahaha, what’s the matter? Come on, use your teleport magic!”
“Damn, the chanting’s not…! Hey, things are getting dire! Sylvia’s movement is becoming more agile!”
… After getting used to that body, Sylvia was no longer being led on by the Crimson Demons, and started to actively attack.
“Kazuma, I’ll guard the entrance into the warehouse, so don’t worry and search inside.”
“You’re still speaking nonsense, come with me!”
I dragged Aqua who was stubborn until the last moment, and used Lurk to advance through the crossfire of spells.
We finally made it to the warehouse and entered through the hole made by Sylvia.
I looked back at Sylvia, who was still chasing the Crimson Demons around.
It was almost dawn; the other side of the hill was gradually getting brighter. However, the warehouse was still pitch dark.
Both Aqua and I could see in the dark, so we jumped in to search for that weapon…
“… Hey, are we going to dig through that big pile over there?”
In the center of the underground warehouse was a mountain of magic items that we had no idea how to use.
The weapon was probably here, but how do we determine which ones were weapons…?
“Hey Kazuma, look, look!”
I was wondering what I should do when Aqua picked something up excitedly and showed it off to me.
“Isn’t that a Game Girl? What’s such an ancient game console doing in a place like this?”
This portable game console was popular before I was born.
Aqua placed the game console on the ground and started going through the mountain of magic items.
“Since there’s a game console, there must be game cartridges. Hey, if you find Tetris, give it to me, okay? I’ll lend it to Kazuma to play too!”
“Did I say that I was here to find games? What I want are weapons! Where’s that weapon-like thing? … By the way, what’s with this? These are all things from Earth…”
The mountain of magic items were game consoles that were sold on Earth.
It was hard for a gamer like me to ignore, but I had a job to do.
And these things looked really pirated.
As if an amateur forcefully crafted the shape of a game console…
At this moment, Aqua found something in a corner of the room and waved to me.
“Hey Kazuma, I found something.”
Aqua said as she showed me a notebook.
I came to her side and peeked at the contents of the notebook.
It was in the so called ancient language according to the Crimson Demon.
… That’s right, it was written in Japanese.
Aqua started reading out the contents of the notebook–
“– O Month X day. Oh no, the secret of the facility has been discovered, but fortunately, they don’t seem to know what I was making. If they find out that I was using the national research funds to make games, I wonder how they would punish me…”
I see, it all made sense now.
This facility was built by a Japanese who was sent to this world before me.
That’s why the passcode at the entrance was the Konami code.
If so, there might be some clues in this notebook.
“– O Month X Day. A high-ranking guy entered my sanctuary and asked me the purpose of these game consoles. There’s no way I can honestly tell him it’s a toy. Thus, I made a serious face and told him that these are weapons that might destroy the world. My female colleague turned on the power supply of the game console timidly, and was startled by the sound of the console starting up. She always acts so fierce, so why was she so afraid of a game console?”
I have an uneasy feeling about this.
“– O Month X Day. They increased my research budget and asked me to create a weapon to fight the Demon King’s army. Sigh, even if you say that, it’s hard to do it. Didn’t I already create all sorts of things with the cheat powers I got after coming to this world? My contribution to the nation was already tremendous. I won’t be able to take it if you keep pushing me like that. I tried telling them with a serious face, ‘War begets nothing…’, but my female colleague slapped my head and said that I only got this job because the Demon King existed. That’s true, but a weapon to fight against the Demon King… What should I make?”
Really uneasy feeling.
I think I heard this happy go lucky tone somewhere before…
Aqua continued reading.
“– O Month X Day. I want to make a giant robot, something that can transform and combine. After I submitted my proposal, they thought I was making fun of them. I was lectured, but I was serious. Out of spite, I said that we just needed to build a huge weapon with super powerful magic resistance. Unexpectedly, that proposal was approved. What the hell, is that fine? Even if you ask me to draw a design, what should I use as reference…? Oh? There’s a stray dog right there. You then, I’ll name the dog-form weapon ‘Mage Killer’.”
… Dog-form weapon?
“– O Month X Day. After I submitted the design plans, they praised it and said, ‘I see, a snake huh? Much better than something with legs. A great idea.’ Eh, I drew a dog. I know my drawing’s poor, but please look closer, this is a sausage dog… On closer inspection, I really drew a snake!”
“– O Month X Day. Experimentation began. Hmm, it’s moving. Although it’s moving, that thing doesn’t have spare batteries. We tried bringing it to attack the demons and found it out of battery in no time. But those fellows were scared out of their wits. Using this chance, I said, ‘This weapon’s still too early for humanity’ and sealed it here. It can’t move since it doesn’t have batteries, but it can be used as material to create chimeras as living weapons. It won’t need batteries that way, and is really cool.”
Ah, I got it.
The owner of this notebook was probably the guy who created that thing.
“– O Month X Day. The new anti-Demon King weapons were created, …well, although I called them that, they were actually modified humans. We tried recruiting volunteers who were willing to undergo modification surgery and we gathered so many that we had to choose the volunteers by drawing lots. Does this bunch really understand what modified humans are? After explaining to them that this surgery was a simple experiment to raise their suitability of being a mage to the limit, the volunteers even made strange requests like, ‘I want a pair of red eyes’, ‘I want a unique call sign’. Is everyone in this nation an idiot?”
Or rather, I’ll find it troubling if there were multiple people who could write such nonsensical notebooks.
“– O Month X Day. The modification surgery’s finished. Those bunch even said something stupid like, ‘Master, please bestow us with a new name’. What Master, just how far are you guys going with this? It was troublesome, so I picked a name at random. They seemed so happy, is their aesthetic sense fine? However, these guys are strong, super strong. The high-ranking people gave me plenty of praises and wanted to give me an important post. From tomorrow onward, I’ll be the director of the research and development laboratory. To be honest, I don’t want the status and would rather have more benefits. Sigh, it’s a rare chance so I’ll give those fellows a clan name. Since their eyes are so red, I’ll call them the ‘Crimson Demons’. My female colleague retorted that the name was too casual and rolled her eyes. Damn that bitch.”
I couldn’t help shouting. Aqua stopped reading out loud and turned to look at me.
“Ah, sorry, please continue.”
The Crimson Demons were modified humans?
Such a heavy fact was mentioned so suddenly…
“– O Month X Day. The Crimson Demons bunch kept yapping to me about creating a nemesis that could fight against them–a ‘Mage Killer’ weapon. Sigh, didn’t I already tell them that thing can’t move? Also, that wasn’t made to be your nemesis, its batteries are flat… No matter how I explained, they just wouldn’t listen. They’re already so old, and yet they’re still in their rebellious stage. I couldn’t stand them anymore, so I sloppily made a… I was thinking of making it sloppily, but somehow, I created something really powerful. This thing’s probably the real weapon that might destroy the world. Its appearance was just like a railgun, although its operation principle had nothing to do with electromagnetic acceleration. I couldn’t think of a good name, so for convenience sake, I’ll name it ‘railgun (fake)’.”
… It wasn’t heavy after all.
“– O Month X Day. The railgun (fake) was amazing, too amazing. So amazing that it scared me. It was meant to be a light weapon that compresses mana and shoots it out, but after those guys tested one shot with it, the power even surprised me. What the hell, this is scary. That might be so, but it won’t last long. It was crafted from random parts, so it’ll break after a few shots. It would be terrible if someone uses it for evil, so let’s seal it here… By the way, this thing’s rather long, just the right length for a laundry pole… Oh no, this is bad, the high authorities seemed to be encouraged by the success of the Crimson Demon project and want to invest a large amount of money to create a super-sized mobile weapon. You think it’s so easy to build such a thing? Did water get inside your brain? Never mind, it’s not my problem anyway.”
… I was very certain.
The owner of this notebook was–
“The notebook ends here… Hey, I think I’ve seen this handwriting somewhere before.”
It was the scientist who built the Mobile Fortress Destroyer and was turned into a pile of bones inside.
From the contents of the notebook, his next work would be the Mobile Fortress Destroyer.
“By the way, didn’t you read a notebook in the mobile fortress too? Is the handwriting the same as this one?”
Aqua clapped her hands as if she just realized something.
This fellow, did she have some useless skill like handwriting forensics?
… No, hold on a minute.
“Hey, that notebook inside the Destroyer, was it in Japanese too?”
“Right your head! Why didn’t you tell me something so important?”
“You didn’t ask!”
Aqua’s words made me hold my head in pain.
“Damn it, so that’s how it is! The one who created this series of messes was another cheater you sent to this world! The Mobile Fortress Destroyer and the Mage Killer were all the work of this moron! Hey you! Don’t keep sending people to this world so irresponsibly! … Ah! Wait!”
I shouted and stopped. Aqua tilted her head puzzledly.
“… Eh, I didn’t notice this before, but– Just how old are you? Were you already a goddess before the mobile fortress was built?”
Pomf– Aqua’s notebook dropped onto the ground.
“… Hey Kazuma, how could you ask a goddess her age? You’ll receive divine retribution, all right? … Let me make this clear, time flows very slowly in the room you and I first met, which means my age’s different from your understanding of age. If you get it, don’t ask this question again. You’ll really receive divine retribution if you do, Satou Kazuma-san.”
Aqua said sternly. I groaned in a soft voice.
“What did you say? Are you kidding me, who’s a grandma? Didn’t I tell you that time passes slowly in that place, so change the way you address me! I’ve just lived a bit longer than you, ahhh!”
–As a gamer, I wanted to bring all of these things back with me. However, now wasn’t the time for that.
“Damn it, where’s the railgun? Since it’s long as a laundry pole, I should be able to find it immediately–!”
I searched through the mountain of home appliances for the railgun (fake).
“Hey Kazuma, the time flow in Japan, heaven and this world are all different. For example, one month in Japan’s just an hour in heaven, but is several months in this world. And so, my age… Hey, are you listening?”
Aqua had been explaining since just now.
“That’s not important! We need to find the railgun! Railgun! Help me find it! It’s something as long as a laundry pole…”
… Long as a laundry pole?
Wait, didn’t I see something similar somewhere in the village a couple of days ago?
That’s right, it’s at the tailor shop of that guy named Chekera–!
“Hey Aqua! I understand, that weapon’s at…!”
I shouted and turned back.
“Ha, this still works, I tried using magic to substitute batteries and it really works. How many game cartridges work with this? I’ll bring as many back as I can…”
I picked up the game console wordlessly and pulled my arm back hard…
“Waaahhhh! My Game Girl!”
In the village that was consumed by fire, I ran with all my might.
… I could hear Aqua’s noisy voice in my ears.
“Give it back! Return my Game Girl to me! You can’t find another one in this world! Compensate me! When we go back to Axel, compensate me with all the bounty you have! Judging by its rarity, three hundred million would be a pretty cheap price!”
“Are you done yet? Now’s not the time for this!! And that thing isn’t yours anyway! You’re so much older than me, so why do you keep saying such childish things?”
“You’ve done it now, I already said that goddesses are forever young! I’ll make you regret aggravating the goddess of water! I’ll curse you, your toilet won’t flush and your warm bath water will turn cold!”
As I kept Aqua who was shouting strange curses at bay, we finally reached the entrance to the tailor shop.
In the courtyard, the silver rifle was placed on the laundry rack, glimmering metallically.
I felt a murderous intent against the person who created the mobile fortress, Mage Killer, and this thing.
And what’s such a dangerous thing doing here? At least keep it properly!
And the villagers got guts too, I really want to lecture them for an entire day for using such a dangerous item as a laundry pole.
This thing was longer than three meters.
I wanted to pick it up, but I couldn’t do it alone, so I got Aqua to help me.
There was something heavy at the back of the gun; it was probably some mechanism that absorbed mana.
He came up with the name ‘railgun’ casually, but this thing really felt like some futuristic weapon.
“All right, now to bring this thing to the Crimson Demons… Hmm?”
Something was off and my heart started pounding.
Suddenly, the sound of explosions disappeared.
I surveyed the surrounding bafflingly.
No matter where I was in the village, I should be able to spot Sylvia’s colossal body.
In the distance, Sylvia stood unmoving.
I sneakily carried the railgun to somewhere near Sylvia…
And saw her staring at a spot motionlessly.
Before her gaze was–
“Isn’t that Yunyun? What’s she doing there…?”
Watching closely, I could see Yunyun standing on a boulder and facing Sylvia.
Seeing that she was alone, I understood immediately.
The other Crimson Demons had exhausted their mana.
However, this wasn’t the only reason why the Crimson Demons were staring at her.
“The daughter of the village chief Yunyun, she…!”
As if they were watching a hero they adored, the Crimson Demons were admiring Yunyun with sparkling eyes.
At this moment, a Crimson Demon said:
“Is the sun rising from the west? That weirdo Yunyun who doesn’t even dare introduce herself is…”
I gulped and watched the situation with Aqua quietly.
Sylvia had a haughty smile as she drew nearer.
She must’ve had enough of the taunts by the Crimson Demons, so why was she taking the bait again?
My doubts were dismissed by Sylvia’s words and the thing Yunyun was showing Sylvia…
“… So, it’s true that your adventurer’s card doesn’t have the teleport spell… Is it a good idea to tell me voluntarily that you can’t use Teleport to escape?”
I didn’t hear the entire conversation, but I could guess the gist of it.
Sylvia must be fed up after being toyed by the Crimson Demons who teleported away just before her attacks could land.
Suddenly, Yunyun offered the information that she couldn’t use teleport magic voluntarily.
And Yunyun was standing on a tall cliff, with nowhere to run.
If she jumped down or dashed toward her companions in the distance, Sylvia could very likely intercept her.
Even if she wanted to attract Sylvia’s attention, there was no need to go that far…
I wanted to shout at Yunyun when I felt my shirt being tugged.
I turned back and found Megumin, who was holding Komekko’s hand, and a depressed Darkness behind me. When did they come over…?
“Kazuma, did you find the weapon? We noticed that Komekko wasn’t at the shelter, so Yunyun volunteered to attract Sylvia’s attention. We used this chance to rescue her from the house…”
Komekko looked sleepy and unsteady on her feet.
Despite the commotion outside, she was still sleeping soundly at home.
This kid will become an amazing person in the future.
“It’s great that all of you are safe. I also found the weapon. By the way, what’s with Darkness? Did something happen?”
“I tried to lure Sylvia away… It was working well at first, but in the end, she said, ‘I can’t be bothered to fight a woman with weak attacks and tough defense’…”
Aqua patted the head of the depressed Darkness gently.
After being found out that she was only good at defense, the other party couldn’t be bothered with her.
But instead of this…
“I understand, it couldn’t be helped. But right now, let’s find a way to rescue Yunyun…”
“No, we’ll only get in the way if we go now! She must’ve planned something! It’s fine, from the way the grass around the boulder was trampled, someone’s already sneaking there to save her, let’s just watch from here!”
Megumin said excitedly, as if she was looking forward to something.
Someone was rescuing her?
But I don’t see anyone.
Under the gaze of everyone in the village, Yunyun raised one leg and balanced herself on the tall and narrow boulder, striking the pose of a crane.
“I’m Yunyun… An Archwizard… User of Advanced Magic…”
At this moment, she glanced at Megumin who was standing beside me.
“The number one mage of the Crimson Demons, and the one who’ll become the village chief!”
Megumin shouted in surprised when she heard Yunyun’s announcement.
Seemed like she was unhappy about Yunyun claiming to be the number one in the Crimson Demons.
With the entire Crimson Demon village was watching her–
“Demon King’s General, Sylvia! As the daughter of the Crimson Demon chieftain…! I’ll show you the taboo spell that’s passed on through the generations of the chieftains!”
With one hand held into the sky, Yunyun chanted.
Those should be the words to invoke lightning type magic.
A flash of blue lightning streaked across the bright morning sky and thunder resounded from behind Yunyun.
Just like the special effects of a superhero making her appearance.
The Crimson Demons all cried passionate tears after seeing Yunyun strike her pose.
“… Ugh… Ugh…!”
Sobbing came from my side. Turning my head, I saw that even Megumin was crying.
Before I understood what happened, the Crimson Demons had erupted.
“Yunyun! Yunyun, she! Yunyun, she has finally awakened!”
“The daughter of the village chief, Yunyun, has finally broken out of her cocoon!”
“Too cool! Yunyun’s too cool!”
“Her powers within her have finally awakened!”
“That’s my student! I taught and trained her with so much care!! Well done Yunyun, you’ve used the knowledge I taught you well…!”
It seemed that for the Crimson Demons, her appearance just now was too cool for school.
This way, Yunyun who was always alone will finally become a part of the village.
At the same time, this was the moment a perfectly normal girl had fallen.
She must’ve made that embarrassing speech because of her drive to save others.
However, we need to keep a close eye on her so she won’t try to kill herself after recalling this moment a few days from now.
Yunyun, looking as if she had burned all that she had, faced Sylvia motionlessly.
Yunyun glanced at an empty space beside her.
“What’s the matter? Little girl who can’t use Teleport. Little girl, aren’t you a typical Crimson Demon who merely put up a facade by saying a secret technique, certain kill, and trump cards? If not, why don’t you show me your so called ‘taboo spell’?”
Sylvia taunted Yunyun, but Yunyun remained still.
Sylvia then approached Yunyun slowly.
Even so, Yunyun was still unmoved.
Finally, Sylvia lowered her posture like a spring storing energy, squirming her lower snake-like body like a drawn bow and prepared to launch herself at Yunyun.
Yunyun suddenly leapt off the boulder and ran.
Sylvia, who had enough of being toyed by the Crimson Demons, said with bloodshot eyes:
“I won’t let you escape, I won’t let you escape, I won’t let you escape, I won’t…!”
She chased Yunyun manically and sprung onto the boulder. At this instant, she suddenly stopped her pursuit.
As if she had discovered something in the direction Yunyun was running to…
A man and a woman appeared out of thin air before Yunyun.
It was Bukkoroli and Soketto.
One of them was using refraction spell to hide and sneak here, and dismissed the spell at this point.
And the other had already finished chanting Teleport of course, and was standing by.
Yunyun ran to their side. Sylvia reached out with her arms when she saw that…!
That was too cruel.
As Sylvia trembled with rage, the Crimson Demons gulped nervously.
“… Fufu, hahaha! This is the strongest group of mages? Aren’t you all just bastards who can only make big talk? Everyone who’s involved with you must be third rate!”
It wasn’t clear if she was laughing because of anger or at the absurdity of the matter.
Sylvia trembled as she laughed out loud.
We were keeping some distance from Sylvia and hiding ourselves–
“Hey Aqua, prepare to attack while her guard is down. Compress that clothes destroying spell into this thing. Our mission is just to bring this back, but we might as well go for gold!”
“Hoho, it’s finally time for a professional like me to take the field. No problem, leave the final attack to me!”
We don’t need to greet her at all.
It’s Sylvia’s fault for being so careless.
At this moment, Aqua nodded; her spell was ready.
I used Lurk to conceal my killing intent and aimed with Snipe.
The target was Sylvia who was still laughing loudly.
I feel just like a sniper. I’ll show them my skill I mastered through countless sniping games.
The moment Aqua cast her spell, it was absorbed by the tail end of the railgun.
At the same time, I aimed at Sylvia and squeezed the trigger without hesitation. The compressed magic spell–
– Didn’t fire out.
I clicked the trigger several times, but nothing happened.
“Hey, what the hell? Is it broken? Or did I leave the safety on…?”
I shook the railgun in a panic, but it remained still.
“Sacred Exorcism! Sacred Exorcism!”
While I was checking the weapon, Aqua cast several spells; she was probably amused by how her magic was absorbed.
Hmm, it was used as a laundry pole all these years, so it might’ve broken down.
“Here, here, let me try. You can fix machines by doing this!”
Darkness said as she knocked the railgun hard.
Was she really an aristocratic lady who received education as a noble?
“Hey Darkness, knock somewhere higher… Yes, right there. Maybe the mana’s stuck there.”
“By the way, that’s the so-called weapon? It looks like the laundry pole Chekera treats like a family heirloom… Maybe some dirt is stuck inside? Let’s clean it with something like a stick.”
While Darkness kept smacking the railgun, Megumin got up to search for a stick.
“Hey… Hey, hey…!”
Aqua said as she tugged on my sleeve while pointing to the distance.
“What? Try casting your spell again! Maybe the spell just now isn’t compatible with the railgun, try another spell…!”
I said as I looked in the direction she was pointing.
Sylvia was looking this way with bloodshot eyes.
“Ara, ara, what are you all doing there? Hmm, what’s that? You’re holding something interesting!!”
Sylvia in the distance locked on to me as her target!
“Wait a moment boy! Put that thing onto the ground slowly. It looks dangerous, that’s what my intuition as a Demon King’s General is telling me!”
Sylvia squirmed her huge silvery body, ignoring the Crimson Demons who were trying to delay her as she headed straight for me.
It seemed like she is very well aware that the railgun I was holding was dangerous.
What should I do? Can I throw this hot potato to someone else?
“Wait! Really, Kazuma, your stats are so much lower than me, but why are you so fast at running away? Did you learn the ‘Escape’ skill just for this? Don’t leave me behind!”
Aqua was right behind me, carrying Komekko.
Komekko, who was in Aqua’s arms, let Aqua do as she pleased, and was hugging Chomusuke that appeared out of nowhere.
This kid will be an amazing person in the future.
“Stop wasting time and hurry! Quick! Hey, Darkness is falling behind! She’s too heavy!
“Do-don’t say I’m heavy! It’s my armor that’s heavy!”
Darkness, who had geared up when I wasn’t around, couldn’t run fast because of her heavy armor.
Sylvia was gaining on her.
No choice, I had to abandon this heavy and stupid weapon…!
“You can’t escape, Satou Kazuma! And listen up, Crimson Demons! From this day forth, I’ll be your nemesis! No matter which corner of the Earth you run to, I’ll find you all and wipe you out! I’ll crush your village no matter where you build it!”
In the village that was burning in a sea of flame, Sylvia announced loudly.
If I hand the railgun over to her, maybe she would let us off…
“Cowardly Crimson Demons! All of you, and anyone who’s related to you, will live a life of running until the end of your days!”
Despite Sylvia’s taunts, the Crimson Demons didn’t move or react to her speech.
These people were smart.
If possible, I really hope they can use their smarts properly.
“Big sister’s not a coward!”
The shout echoed throughout the village, and was even louder than Sylvia’s mocking.
With Chomusuke tightly in her arms, Komekko was held in Aqua’s arms when she shouted at Sylvia.
I was also curious about Chomusuke who was trembling and had teeth marks on its head, but–
“I can’t pretend I didn’t hear that. This is an affair between the Crimson Demons and the Demon King’s army. If Kazuma hands the weapon over, would you let the three of them go?”
The reckless mage from my team said defiantly.
I really didn’t get whether her boiling point was high or low.
She suddenly stopped herself from running and pointed her staff at Sylvia.
Sylvia also stopped and observed Megumin carefully. Finally, she smiled disdainfully.
“Ara, aren’t you that little girl with a weak sense of presence? Speaking of which, I haven’t seen you using magic yet. What kind of ‘port’ would the spell be?”
When she heard Sylvia’s sarcastic words, Megumin said in a clear voice:
“I have yet to introduce myself. My name’s Megumin. Also, I’m the real number one mage of the Crimson Demons.”
It seemed like she was really concerned about Yunyun claiming to be the ‘number one mage of the Crimson Demons’.
Megumin didn’t make a ‘spectacular’ entrance as usual, but uttered her name calmly.
Sylvia was very surprised by her self-introduction.
“You’re really a unique Crimson Demon… So, you won’t introduce yourself in a weird way? For the Crimson Demons, isn’t acting cool important to you?”
Sylvia appeared to be toying with Megumin. But Megumin didn’t take the bait, not even batting her eyes once.
“Big sister’s amazing! Her spell’s so powerful she even destroyed an evil god!”
Komekko, who was still in Aqua’s arms, shouted.
Megumin glanced at Komekko and smiled.
“I’ll leave Komekko to you. A newborn calf doesn’t fear the tiger, she’ll make a lot of enemies that way. I’ll destroy that thing with my certain kill spell.”
Ignoring me, she removed the eye-patch covering one of her eyes.
Wouldn’t it be bad if the village learned that you know explosion?
Sylvia taunted after hearing what Megumin said.
“Ara, ara, this again, certain kill magic! I’m tired of hearing that!”
I could hear the Crimson Demons whispering to each other.
“What’s wrong with Hyoizaburoi’s daughter? She’s always been boisterous.”
“She needs to build more tension if she wants to use a certain kill spell!”
“The opening speech is too plain, too plain!”
The Crimson Demons didn’t know that Megumin was serious about using this certain kill magic.
I soothed her by saying that she was the trump card for crucial moments, but only did so to stop this short-fused mage from using spells inside the village.
Megumin was motivated, but if she used her spell, the village will find out her secret. Furthermore, it was doubtful whether the spell would really work. Using Explosion so recklessly was a bad idea.
I couldn’t guarantee that I could escape with Megumin who exhausted her mana in tow.
“… Hey Megumin, I have something to tell you.”
Before I could attempt to convince her, Megumin cut me off softly.
“I heard from Aqua earlier… Kazuma can read the ancient language in the underground warehouse, right?”
My entire body quivered.
That girl, saying unnecessary things again!
However, her telling me this now meant…
Megumin’s lips rose in a smile.
“… Sorry for making you clean up after I made a mess. This time, I’ll clean up after Kazuma.”
… The Crimson Demons were smart.
I realized once again at this moment.
– Megumin’s eyes glowed vermillion.
Intrigued, Sylvia taunted her:
“Little girl, are you done? You won’t take the initiative anyway, right? When I attack, you’ll teleport away at the right moment, right?”
However, the reckless mage in my team just stood there quietly after hearing these taunts with her staff raised.
Not just Sylvia, all the Crimson Demons were surprised.
… Oh no.
She was serious.
I knew very well the power of Megumin’s explosion.
From the position of the Crimson Demons watching the show, they were just outside the blast range.
But being outside the blast range only means they won’t die from the blast.
Since no one will die from the explosion, she can use her full power without hesitation.
“Hey, you guys! Get away from Sylvia! As far as you can!”
For some reason, the Crimson Demons who heard my roar started cheering–
“As expected of Megumin’s comrade! He’s an outsider, but he knows how to set the atmosphere!”
“He’s pretty good… That anxious face looks like he’s being serious.”
They kept talking about irresponsible things.
“Idiots! She’s really going to use a certain kill spell now! Run away! Run away quickly!”
Not just the Crimson Demons, even Sylvia was laughing.
These, these guys were all thinking that I was kidding…!
I gave up.
I stood together with Darkness and the others by Megumin’s side.
“Megumin, don’t worry, even if Explosion doesn’t work, I’ll stall that snake woman. Just imagining being constricted by that metallic body makes me, ahhh…!
“You’re still so persistent in your fetish even under the threat of death!”
“To protect Komekko, I’ll just stand far away.”
I grabbed Aqua who offered a random reason to let her run away, put the railgun at my feet and drew my katana.
Megumin watched our interactions with a faint smile.
After which, she confidently and calmly chanted her explosion spell.
The Crimson Demons immediately turned silent when they heard this chant.
As expected of professional mages, they already understood–
– That Megumin wasn’t bluffing.
The Crimson Demons started escaping with panic, while Sylvia turned her head and watched, not understanding what was happening.
During the one year we spent together, I listened to Megumin chant this spell every day.
After knowing her for so long, I could roughly gauge when her spell would be ready.
Sylvia finally noticed from the flow of mana in Megumin’s body and the reaction of the Crimson Demons that her ‘certain kill spell’ wasn’t a joke.
Megumin had never acted seriously before, so she seemed scary when she did.
“Certain kill spell? … I, I don’t care if it’s Blast or Detonation, it won’t harm me since I’ve merged with the Mage Killer! Try it if you don’t believe me! It’s futile, time to die…!”
Sylvia shouted as she crossed her arms before her like Ultraman.
Megumin opened her crimson eyes wide and shouted her spell after channeling all her mana into it.
Overwhelming mana expanded and burst out from Megumin’s staff!
Realizing what spell Megumin was using, Sylvia’s expression turned to panic. Megumin’s magic flew straight toward Sylvia–
… Midway there, it was sucked into the mana absorbent part of railgun I threw on the ground.
It happened so suddenly, not just us, even Sylvia and the Crimson Demons all groaned in surprise.
At the same time, Megumin fell like a piece of paper after exhausting her mana.
Sylvia was probably angry from the short instant when she felt afraid–
“Scaring me for nothing, you little brat! Watch me tear you into pieces!”
Sylvia, whose voice turned masculine, charged this way with a scary face!
An angry transvestite is scary! Really scary!
At least keep your feminine tone–!
“Damn it! Because of this junk, the situation became worse!”
“Ka-Kazuma, Sylvia’s charging this way! I’ll leave Megumin who’s exhausted her mana to you! Don’t worry about me, let me enjoy myself for a few hours before rescuing me…”
“Kazuma! As a goddess, protecting a frail life like Komekko is my obligation, so I’ll make a move first!”
Why is every single one of you so useless?
“Hey, that thing’s beeping.”
Beside me, Komekko who was in Aqua’s arms said suddenly.
On the side of the railgun placed on the ground, a ‘FULL’ gauge was blinking.
I remember now that the notebook said this was a machine that compresses mana and fires it out.
It wasn’t broken, it’s just that there wasn’t enough mana for it to activate.
I lifted the railgun in one fell swoop and aimed at the approaching Sylvia…!
“Demon King’s General, Sylvia! Remember my name! Send my regards to the other generals in hell! My name’s Sa–”
I wanted to squeeze the trigger after stating my name, but Komekko who was in Aqua’s arms pulled the trigger before I did.
With a powerful recoil, the front of the railgun emitted a bright beam of light.
This bright beam pierced through Sylvia’s tail, which she rose in the nick of time to try to protect herself. Not only that, the beam opened a large hole in Sylvia’s chest.
The beam of light didn’t weaken at all, hitting the hill behind the Crimson Demon village, right at a protruding corner…!
Amidst the blinding light and deafening boom, a corner of the hill disappeared.
The moment I discarded the remnants of the railgun that deformed due to the intense heat, Sylvia crumpled to the ground with a loud bang.
The dying Sylvia collapsed onto the ground vomiting blood, still unable to believe what just happened.
“… Hmm? Could, could it be, that I…?”
After witnessing this scene, we and the Crimson Demons who fled further away stood stiff on the spot.
Komekko who was in Aqua’s arm got onto the ground and struck a pose.
“I’m Komekko! The number one demonic sister of the Crimson Demons! The one who’s stronger than a Demon King’s general!”
She stole my kill!
The Crimson Demons took care of Sylvia’s corpse.
I heard that Sylvia’s body, having merged with the Mage Killer, could be used to craft defensive equipment with high magic resistance.
This must be what ‘blessing in disguise’ meant.
The Crimson Demon village that was being ravaged destructively until dawn was now…
“What the hell.”
Seeing the village being rebuilt with terrifying speed, I was dumbstruck.
The debris was blown away by a spell, the stones cut from boulders turned into golems, which walked to the construction sites by themselves.
A six-armed demon that was probably summoned by magic was wielding a large construction tool in each hand.
“… Hey Megumin, what’s with this? How is the reconstruction proceeding so fast?”
I asked Megumin.
Once again, I learned how broken the Crimson Demons were.
“What do you mean? I don’t know how long reconstruction takes in other cities, but you shouldn’t compare us to them.”
“… Just tell me, how long does it take to return the village back to the way it was?”
It would just take three days…?
The village ravaged by the Demon King’s army could be rebuilt in just three days.
“… I saw a girl saying sadly, ‘The village is burning…’ or something like that, and felt really guilty about it.”
“That’s strange. If it’s just a fire, it’ll be simple to rebuild. Everyone in the village should know that… What does she look like?”
I remember she had the same eye-patch as Megumin…
“… That’s her.”
I pointed at the eye-patch girl who just happened to be strolling before us.
“What? You’ve some business with me, outsider? Hey, Megumin, I was just looking for you.”
“Hey Arue, long time no see.”
Seemed like they were acquainted.
“Megumin, could you look at this, I just finished the ‘Legend of the Crimson Demon Hero’ chapter two. The scene about the burning of the Crimson Demon village is really descriptive; I’m really confident about it.”
The scene about the burning of the Crimson Demon village…
Wasn’t Arue that…?
That weirdo who sent that letter out of nowhere?
“Hoho, let me read your masterpiece…”
The one who forced me to come to this village?
“So, it’s you, ahhh!!”
I grabbed the stack of paper from Megumin and tore them in half.
“Ahhh… My, my masterpiece…!! The crystallization of my efforts after staying up all week…!!”
“This is the first time I’ve seen Arue who’s usually cool and collected acting like this.”
Arue hugged the torn pieces of papers and collapsed onto the ground. Megumin patted her shoulder.
“It’s your fault…! All because of you! Do you know how much I was looking forward to it and how happy I was? Do you know how depressed I became? Stop toying with a man’s heart!”
“Me-Megumin, what’s with this rude man? Doing something so mean to someone he just met! I’m really scared!”
“You created a series of misunderstandings that almost scared me to death! You even said something like, ‘The village is burning…’! And what was with your new work? While we were risking death in battle outside, you were snuggling at home and writing that? Do you know how much trouble I went through because of the doodling you mailed to Yunyun?”
“Hey, both of you calm down, this is the first time you’ve met, so why are you two so…? Hey! … You two! If you keep on fighting, I’ll use my super high stats to make you taste some suffering!”
After witnessing the abnormal reconstruction speed of the Crimson Demon village, we spent our last night here.
“– Kazuma, what’s with you? You were in a good mood when all of us were having dinner, but your face looks bad after going out for a while.”
Megumin didn’t know why I was sulking and asked.
“What’s with me? Your ‘mixed hot spring’ is that ‘what’! Is that naming a joke? It’s not mixed gender and it’s not a hot spring, so why use such a name?”
After understanding why I was angry–
“Oh, so that’s where you went. That’s one of the attractions in this village, a place all visitors should visit.”
“This village is too much! I can’t even take a bath without being toyed with! Really, this is the worst vacation!”
Sylvia was defeated and her minions wiped out.
The reconstruction of the village was also progressing smoothly, and the entire incident had concluded.
“I’m very satisfied with this vacation though.”
Megumin, who was sleeping beside me, said.
I wanted to have a good rest on the last night in the Crimson Demon village, but I never thought I’d be forced to sleep with Megumin again.
Rather than being put to sleep by a slumber spell and pushed by Madam, Megumin opted to sleep with me willingly.
Since she adopted such an attitude from the very start, I lost the drive to even sexually harass her.
Darkness objected as usual, and was put to sleep just like Hyoizaburo.
Right now, I was sharing a bedding with Megumin.
“… Really, I was targeted by orcs, then by Sylvia these past few days–people I’d rather not have anything to do with.”
“What a coincidence, me too.”
“I, I’m really sorry…”
Thinking back on my actions these past few days, I averted my eyes guiltily.
Megumin’s mischievous laugh came from the side.
“If Kazuma feels guilty about it, then… Right, tell me something fun. I want to hear about stories from the country Kazuma lived in.”
Megumin said as she looked my way–
“– And so, I reacted on the spot and asked the girl next door to use the money to buy chocolate and send it to me by today. I even promised that she could keep the change. In the end, the plan proceeded smoothly, so my younger brother only got a chocolate from my mother, but I had my mother’s as well as the one bought by that girl. At this moment, the long competition between my brother and I concluded, and I defended my pride as the elder brother.”
Megumin, who was listening to me seriously all this while, said:
“So, you hired a helper to win the battle. I’m relieved that Kazuma was like this in the past too… But that’s such a strange custom, is it really that bad to not receive any chocolate on that day?”
Megumin asked about that annoying day curiously.
“Bad isn’t even close to describing it. If I can go back in time, I’ll kill the guy who invented such a damnable culture. That’s how pitiful any man who doesn’t receive any chocolate is. And overcoming that wasn’t the end. We have to return the favor to the girls.”
“… Return the favor? What’s that?”
I explained this evil practice to her.
“If you receive chocolates from a girl, you’ll have to give something three times as expensive to the girl one month later as thanks. That’s how evil it was. If you don’t, you would be completely shunned by the girls. You’ll be mocked if you don’t get chocolate, and even if you do, you’ll still need to break the bank. This day is that sinful and dirty.”
After listening to me, Megumin tilted her head curiously.
“Why didn’t you receive any chocolate? You might lack some basic manners as a person, but from my observation after spending so much time with you, you still have some good points too. For example, you’re very, very… Gentle…? No. Down to earth…? Wrong too… Hmm? … Hmm? Have your life in order? But you were in debt… Eh, how should I put this…?”
“Put this my ass! Work harder in stating my good points!”
Come on, I have plenty of good points, right?
“… Eh, you’re not very honest about it, but you’re always concerned about your comrades…? I don’t hate this part about Kazuma.”
Concerned about comrades?
That’s the catchphrase of girls, the classic line to indicate there aren’t romantic feelings for someone, the same thing as ‘you’re a good person’.
I didn’t really care about these, so I didn’t feel resentful.
Because of my encounter with the orcs and Sylvia, I’m so vulnerable that I’ll harbor positive feelings for any woman with normal looks.
And so, I wasn’t dissatisfied by such praises that didn’t sound like praises at all!
“If I go to the country Kazuma lived in… When it’s Valentine’s, I’ll give you chocolates. You can show it off to your brother then.”
This girl was cruel too, saying such things so nonchalantly.
“Didn’t you hear what I said? That whatever-tines is a day when you give chocolates to someone you like. If you give chocolate recklessly just because you’re a bit close to a boy, that boy will immediately misunderstand and end up miserable. Don’t do that. If you do something like that in my country, you’ll be labeled an easy woman.”
After hearing my reply–
“But, I do like you.”
She said nonchalantly.
“What did you just say? Please repeat it exactly again.”
My ears didn’t have weird problems that filter out such key phrases.
Megumin poked her head out of the blanket and giggled mischievously.
“I don’t dislike you.”
“Hey, that’s different from what you said just now, you think my memory’s that poor?”
Megumin laughed again.
She then said in a calm tone.
“What? What is it? I’m all prepared and ready to go!”
Was she influenced by the atmosphere and willing to go with the mood and confess?
Is that it?
Sylvia was defeated. No one will get in our way tonight.
Megumin resolved herself–
“Kazuma, if it was possible…”
What was it?
Say it now!
As I waited full of expectations, Megumin asked quietly:
“– Do you want an excellent mage?”